i spent my birthday shopping for new furniture with my wife. what an irrelevant, superficial, unimportant waste of time. then i went out to dinner i ate too much. I drank too much. I missed a basketball game i badly wanted to watch. now i am fighting the black cloud of depression. i am looking for something positive in the experience.
actually when i read all about the hardships on this site, I become somewhat more accepting of my own problems, as they might be judged as relatively minor.
i did make it through the day without fighting with my wife, which i consider a significant achievement, but it seems as if I have a long arduous time ahead as she redoes the whole house. i don't know if i can handle that. my values just aren't aligned with hers. once she gets started she wants a new bedroom suite, a new dining room suite, some new fixtures, new rugs, new couches etc etc. she has to do this fairly quickly so we can impress our summer visitors. If i don't co-operate with her...she says i don't care about her feelings. i am trying to handle this in some sort of rational emotional way, without reacting negatively...I have to try to have a ratinal discussion with her regarding budgets etc..maybe i should just let her take care of it, whichever way she wants. i can't really handle conflict with her. she goes totally beseark at the slightest disagreeement and threatens to move out or kill herself or both.
writing helps me relax somewhat. as i wrote above there are more serious problems on this site, but of course that doesn't solve my problem.
take care...the world is a curious place
bob
